Wednesday, February 18, 2004

i'm still a disgusting fucker and i make myself sick. i wish i could obliterate myself into a billion pieces...

Tuesday, January 27, 2004

this process is taking way to long and i always stumble backwards and fall down.

i suck at life.

Tuesday, January 20, 2004

Friday, January 16, 2004

i'm so gross and i can't stand it.

help the demons in my head and let me be content for once.

god, i need to make changes for real this time.

Sunday, January 11, 2004

hi...i hate me again.

need to get back in control.

lose weight and be a stick.

get good grades.

get a real boyfriend that i like.

try and find myself.

i need a fucking reality check.

Thursday, January 08, 2004

i've gone a little off track but i'll get back on tomorrow. i've no worries about it. i know this time it's for real.

my mommy loves me cause she made me a smoothie.

tomorrow is the concert and i'm meeting claudia at 6. i'm happy.

i hope matt's mom gets better but part of me doesn't only so that i won't have to see him. i really need to do the right thing this time, no matter what. i really need to feel good about myself. i really just need to love me.

i'm black and blue and the sutures are hurting. fucking ay. gonna watch some sex and the city.

Tuesday, January 06, 2004

i have no energy anymore. this barely eating thing is good but making me so tired.

at least i'm finally feeling good about myself.

can't wait to be back at school.

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